Oh Right.

by katelin on October 5, 2017

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I’m seventeen weeks pregnant and every day kind of feels like 50 First Dates, where I wake up and have to remind myself that this is really happening. It’s weird. You’d think I’d remember that I was pregnant. And you’d think I wouldn’t have to double check every day that I didn’t make it up. But then, you’d be wrong.

I don’t know why this hasn’t sunk in yet. I still don’t always mention it when people ask and I’m not totally showing all the time. Don’t get me wrong, I am excited. But it still just doesn’t feel real.

I think when I got pregnant with Riley it felt surreal but in a different way. It was something we were trying for and something that had all of my time and energy for months and months. And once I did get pregnant it was literally all I could think about. Combine that with getting laid off towards the end of my pregnancy and my brain was 100% focused on baby things.

This time around, my brain is everywhere.

My brain is trying to figure out how to deal with toddler tantrums, my brain is trying to decide what to make for dinner, my brain is trying to remember if I RSVPed for that thing this weekend, my brain is trying to figure out our finances, my brain is exhausted. And every now and then my brain is like “OH HEY, YOU’RE HAVING A BABY.”

Every now and then when my brain reminds me that I’m having a baby I randomly survey our apartment and try to picture what life is going to be like in a few months. I try and imagine where the rock-n-play will go or where we’ll fit baby toys among Riley’s fleet of vehicles. I try and imagine leaving the house with a baby strapped to me and a toddler running wild down the hallway.

It’s all very strange right now in my brain. And eventually this pregnancy will actually feel real and kick in. In the meantime, I’ll just pinch myself every day and count those blessings that this little guy is going to be here soonish.

 

happy thursday!

Posted in Me Things

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