Poopgate.

by katelin on May 23, 2017

Untitled
Warning: This is a post about poop. If you don’t want to read about poop, please click away, maybe here instead.

One. I never imagined I would write a blog post about poop.
Two. I’m mildly embarrassed I’m writing a blog post about poop.
Three. I AM SO SICK OF POOP.
Four. That is already too many mentions of poop.

Anyhoo. You guys. My child. My child has developed a love of scratching his butt. Even when it has poop. Hence. POOPGATE. As in, we go to get him in the morning and he proudly shows his hands to us (like in the picture above, only with poop instead of washable purple chalk paint) while saying “No touch poop” when in fact, he did touch poop and is covered in poop. As is his crib, his pillowcase, his stuffed animals, his blankets.

POOPGATE.

WHERE WAS THIS IN THE PARENTING BOOKS, GUYS?!

I AM NOT READY FOR THIS.

As I type this we have experienced five (or six, I’ve honestly lost count because it’s slowly crushing my soul) Poopgates. The last one being this past Saturday morning. And each one has been terrible. TERRIBLE.

We have so many two-piece pajama sets for Riley but after Saturday’s debacle I went out and bought a few one-piece zipper jammies. I honestly don’t know what else to do. I only worry because summer is coming and it gets hot (granted sometimes we sleep with the AC on) and a one-piece long-sleeved body suit may get too warm, even if it is thin cotton. I also don’t want to buy a ton of pajamas because this kid is growing.

You guys, WHAT DO I DO!?

How do I magically get my child to stop itching his butt?

Also, why are kids so gross?

But really, HELP. PLEASE.

Any tips? I’ll take em.

Also, I know you mean well and one day I’ll laugh at this a lot. But please don’t say “this will pass” or “you’ll miss these days.” Because, NOPE. I will not miss POOP.

 

 

happy (poop-free!) tuesday!

Posted in My Crazy Life

Previous post:

Next post: