You know those times when you have nothing to say but at the same time everything to say? Yeah those times. I’ve been having a lot of those times lately. Those times where EVERYTHING is on my mind at the same time.
The past three weeks I had a stye in my eye that was giving me a constant pressure headache and I felt pretty low. I mean, how do I keep getting this weird ass ailments?! First I threw out my back in April and then last month my mouth was in serious pain and then the eye. It was just so frustrating. And I couldn’t take it. I would come home and just want to sleep it off and make these weird things go away. I would whine and complain and it was so immature but I just didn’t know what else to do.
On top of that, Matt and I have been having all sorts of talks lately. Money talk and baby talk and life talk and just EVERYTHING. And let me tell you, it is terrifying. And frustrating. And it’s brought me to tears sometimes. And honestly, Adulthood is Hard.
Can we put that on a shirt and sell it? Because hell it is true, Adulthood isn’t easy and sometimes I just don’t know how to make it work.
But then again, do any of us?
Unfortunately there is no yellow brick road, no guide book, no “here’s how it’s done”, nothing. Adulthood is just this little [big] thing that we have to figure out. And somehow I will.
Despite my whining and ranting and rambling post (it’s okay if you’ve already stopped reading this) and the uncertainty of it all I have a feeling that one day I’ll look back and say “I don’t know why I worried so much, I always knew I’d figure it out.” And I will. We will. We all will.
Somehow, Adulthood will make sense and it’ll work for us.
It may not be the plan we had mapped out for ourselves and it may not be what our friends have that we want so bad, but it’ll happen. And one day I’ll stop freaking out and hopefully that same day my body will stop having random things happen to it (because that would be swell).
So. For now. I’m going to look Adulthood square in the face and say “HEY! CUT IT OUT. AND CUT US SOME SLACK. And I don’t get you, but let’s be friends okay?” and then hopefully we’ll all be on the right track.
So yeah. There’s that on my mind.
What about you?
*looking back this is one of the most ramblingest post ever, but I’m hitting publish anyways. sometimes random rambles just need to be shared*Posted in Me Things